English is an SVO (subject-verb-object) language. The easiest thing is to keep the
subject verb and object (or complement or, simply, all that comes after the
verb) together as much as possible. Often, however, you need to add extra
information, usually of an adverbial nature and often to do with time, place
and mode.
She soothed the baby.
Fine, no problem. Subject-verb-object.
She gently soothed the
fat baby. Again, no problem, except you have thrown in an adverb (gently) between
the subject and the verb and expanded the object with an adjective (fat). That’s ok,
my brain can take it.
She gently soothed the
fat baby all night long. My comprehension skills remain unfazed.
She gently and sweetly
soothed the fat baby with lullabies all
night long. All right, I still
follow.
She gently and sweetly
soothed the baby all night long with lullabies that she sang in a raucous,
broken and despairing voice. It’s getting complicated, but I can still
manage.
Now what if I want to say something else about this fat, demanding baby?
She gently and sweetly soothed the fat baby who was suffering from colic all night long with lullabies that she sang in a raucous, broken and despairing voice.
She gently and sweetly soothed the fat baby who was suffering from colic all night long with lullabies that she sang in a raucous, broken and despairing voice.
Well, now we have a problem. All night
long may refer to the colic being suffered by the baby or it may refer to
the mother’s soothing. Even if we add commas, it’s still unclear – or just
reads funny:
She gently and sweetly soothed the fat baby, who was suffering from colic, all night long with lullabies that she sang in a raucous, broken and despairing voice.
She gently and sweetly soothed the fat baby, who was suffering from colic, all night long with lullabies that she sang in a raucous, broken and despairing voice.
When things start getting complicated like this, take
adverbs or expressions of time, place and mode and move them to the left – to
before the subject – then add a comma. This will give you:
All night long, she gently and sweetly soothed the fat baby who was suffering from colic with lullabies that she sang in a raucous, broken and despairing voice.
All night long, she gently and sweetly soothed the fat baby who was suffering from colic with lullabies that she sang in a raucous, broken and despairing voice.
Can we do better? Sure. We can even start sounding poetic:
All night long, gently and sweetly, she soothed the fat baby who was suffering from colic with lullabies that she sang in a raucous, broken and despairing voice.
All night long, gently and sweetly, she soothed the fat baby who was suffering from colic with lullabies that she sang in a raucous, broken and despairing voice.
But wait, that still sounds funny because now we have an
unlucky baby apparently suffering from colic with lullabies, which is a
strange sort of ailment.
More commas might help:
All night long, gently and sweetly, she soothed the fat baby, who was suffering from colic, with lullabies that she sang in a raucous, broken and despairing voice.
More commas might help:
All night long, gently and sweetly, she soothed the fat baby, who was suffering from colic, with lullabies that she sang in a raucous, broken and despairing voice.
Hmm. We might want to rearrange it even more:
All night long, with lullabies that she sang in a raucous, broken and despairing voice, she gently and sweetly soothed the fat baby who was suffering from colic.
All night long, with lullabies that she sang in a raucous, broken and despairing voice, she gently and sweetly soothed the fat baby who was suffering from colic.
In this final version, we have effectively returned to a SVO
construction. That is to say, we have maintained the subject-verb-object (She [gently and sweetly] soothed the [fat] baby) that is at the heart of the sentence with as few interruptions as possible.
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